Funeral and Memorial Flowers Guide

What to send, when to send, and how to express your sympathy

Losing someone is never easy. During times of grief, finding the right words or gestures can feel overwhelming. One of the most meaningful ways to show support is by sending flowers. A thoughtful floral tribute can express love, respect, and heartfelt condolences when words are difficult to find. Whether you're attending a funeral, sending flowers to a memorial service, or offering comfort to a grieving family, understanding funeral flower etiquette can help you make a thoughtful choice.

Why flowers matter

Flowers have long been a symbol of remembrance, hope, and compassion. They bring beauty and comfort during difficult moments and let grieving families know they are surrounded by people who care. Different floral arrangements serve different purposes, and selecting the right one depends on your relationship with the deceased and their family.

Choosing the right funeral flowers

Sympathy arrangement

A sympathy arrangement is typically sent directly to the family's home. It provides comfort in the days following the loss and can be enjoyed long after the service.

Best for: Friends, neighbors, extended family, business associates, clubs and organizations.

Flowers and arrangements include:

• Roses – A timeless symbol of love, respect, and remembrance.
• Hydrangeas – Represent heartfelt emotions, gratitude, and understanding.
• Seasonal Mixed Arrangements – Designed with fresh, seasonal blooms to create a warm and comforting tribute.

Color choices:

• White – Traditionally a symbol of sympathy and compassion in many cultures.
• A favorite color – If you know the deceased had a favorite color or flower, choose an arrangement that reflects that.
• Seasonal Mixed – Reflect your choice in your messaging, e.g. "We hope these flowers bring you light at your time of loss."

Funeral sprays and wreaths

Traditional standing sprays are often displayed on easels during the funeral or memorial service and are often sent by family members. Rather than a large statement piece, it may be more appropriate to send the family an arrangement for the service and then follow up with a monthly subscription for a couple of months after — a lasting way to let them know they are still in your thoughts.

Casket sprays

Casket sprays are large floral arrangements placed on top of the casket. These are traditionally chosen by the immediate family and are generally not ordered by friends or acquaintances.

When should you send funeral flowers?

Timing is important, but don't worry if you can't send flowers immediately.

Before the funeral

If possible, arrange for flowers to arrive at the funeral home before the service begins. This allows them to be displayed during the visitation or ceremony. 

For a memorial service

Flowers can also be delivered to churches, memorial venues, or celebration of life services before guests arrive. We may need to deliver them the previous day, to allow the church or funeral home time to set up and prepare for the service. 

After the funeral

It's perfectly appropriate to send sympathy flowers to the family's home in the days or weeks after the funeral. Many families appreciate knowing they are still being thought of after the services have ended.

What flowers should you avoid?

While there are no strict rules, it's wise to consider cultural or religious traditions. Some families may request donations to a charity instead of flowers, no flowers at all, or specific colors or styles. Always check the obituary or funeral notice for any special requests.

Writing a meaningful sympathy card

Your message doesn't need to be long. The most sincere words are often the simplest. Examples include:

• "Thinking of you during this difficult time and sending our deepest sympathy."
• "May loving memories bring you comfort and peace."
• "With heartfelt condolences to you and your family."
• "Our thoughts and prayers are with you."
• "Wishing you strength and comfort in the days ahead."

If you knew the person well, sharing a brief memory can make your message especially meaningful.

Funeral flower etiquette

• Respect the family's wishes if they request donations in lieu of flowers.
• Send flowers early enough to arrive before the service whenever possible.
• Immediate family typically chooses the casket spray and florals to decorate the location.
• Larger arrangements are usually sent to the funeral service; bouquets are often sent to the family's home.
• Always include your name so the family knows who sent the flowers.
• If you're unsure what to choose, ask your florist for guidance.

Flowers for different relationships

For Immediate Family

Choose pieces that will be used as part of the service — altar dressing, a memory table, casket spray, urn riser, or larger pedestal-style arrangements.

For Friends

A sympathy bouquet is a thoughtful choice.

For Coworkers

A larger arrangement sent to the service from the office is often appreciated.

For Neighbors or Acquaintances

A tasteful sympathy bouquet delivered to the family's home is a kind gesture.

A gesture that speaks from the heart

No arrangement can remove the pain of losing a loved one, but flowers remind grieving families they are not alone. Whether you choose a simple bouquet or an elaborate tribute, your thoughtfulness provides comfort during one of life's most difficult moments.

If you are ordering online and sending funeral or sympathy flowers in the Minneapolis and St. Paul metro area, please include the funeral or visitation time, the funeral home or church, and the full name of the deceased in the Delivery Notes section at checkout. For example: "S/O John Doe" (Service of John Doe). This information helps us reference the obituary, coordinate the delivery, and ensures your floral tribute arrives in good time before the service begins.

If you're uncertain about which arrangement is most appropriate, the experienced designers at Spruce Flowers are here to help. Call us at 612-767-1101 and we will be more than happy to assist you.